My Top 10 Totally Arbitrary Marriage Strategies

Today is my 7th wedding anniversary and I'm very happy to say I love my husband and think he's a great guy.
   
My husband and I have been involved for 13 years, which isn't breaking any records, but sadly many marriages can't even make it that many months.  I've read many blog entries from a Christian perspective about keeping your marriage strong.  Not to take anything away from those, but as a confirmed agnostic, it's not my style.  Below are my top ten tips, not in any particular order.  If they bring you happiness in your relationship, pass them on to so someone else who could use them.

Ten Tips for Keeping Your Marriage Strong

1. Be a Team Player - Yes, that means sometimes you will take one for the team and say absolutely nothing about it.

2. Fight Fair - You work hard as parents to teach your kids to manage their emotions effectively.  Don't be an adult who throws tantrums.

3. Flirt - I mean with your spouse - because it's fun, and once a long time ago you thought it was really fun, so remember it still is.

4. Exercise - It doesn't have to be together, but keep yourselves healthy.  If you want to be together a long time you'd rather walk hand in hand along the sand rather than  navigating walkers.

5. Get over it quickly - Drama is for the theater.

6.  Laugh - At yourself, at each other.  Life's a journey, not a destination - so enjoy it.

7.  Support each other - We all take risks and sometimes make bad choices.  Be there for your partner in their life. 

8.  It's all about timing -  It's easier to recognize your timing was bad after a simple request turns into an argument. Try to think ahead a bit.

9. Make Whoopie  -  If he was once so ambitious he even sewed, he probably still wants some.

10.  Be THANKFUL - of each other and your hopefully wonderful marriage!

Now if I could just practice my own advice and follow these 10 tips regularly, I just might be able to stay married another 7 years!


We're off to see The Hobbit and get sushi so it's gonna be great day.

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Weekend Away

The highlight of our homeschool week was the time we didn't spend homeschooling. My husband and I got to run away for a 2 night stay at a bed and breakfast. No special occasion, just in honor of the grandparents being willing to keep the kids.

Left:  View of the Carillon  Top Right:  Sundial at the base of the tower  Bottom Right:  View of the orange groves

We spent a whole day at Bok Tower. Bok Tower is a really interesting place.  It's in Lake Wales Florida which is not really a destination location, no offense meant, it's just rather out of the way.  The tower and grounds were built as a place to honor nature, encourage reflection, and peace for humanity.  All of it was originated and financed by Edward Bok who was the editor of Ladies Home Journal for over 25 years.  He hired leaders in their field at the time to do the work such as Frederick Law Olmsted (who designed central park) to design the grounds and Samuel Yellin's firm (who did the Federal Reserve bank in New York) to do the ironwork.

I had really wanted to take a tour of the house.  The Garden acquired the neighboring estate Pinewood, whose grounds were also designed by Olmsted.  It's normally open for self guided tours but both times I've visited in the past I've had the kids and didn't want that battle.  Unfortunately, this time it was closed for Christmas decorating so I still didn't get to go.  Oh well, it gives me something new for next time still.
 

The next day we took a trip to the Florida Citrus Arboretum. The Arboretum is one of our best kept local secrets. It's a really amazing place. They have over 250 varieties of citrus on 4 acres. Most of the varieties you've of course never heard of, or had a chance to taste before. While there, you can eat all you want. For a fee, you can pick fruit by the bushel. This is the second time we've been. Last time we went it was December so a different set of varieties was ripe. That's part of the fun since you never know what you're going to get.

We came home with samples of:  Brown's Select Satsumas, Kimbrough Satsumas, Sunki Satsumas, Meiwa Kumquats, Procimequats, Lakeland Limequats, Variegated Rough Lemon, Red Rough Lemon, Nine Pound Lemon, Hirado Pummelo, Liang Ping Yau Pummelo, Pink Pummelo and Marisol Clementine.

We started three liqueurs from some of our haul.  Homemade liqueurs make great holiday gifts.  In the past we've made Calamondin liqueur from our neighbors tree.  The tree's gotten so old it's not producing anymore.  The book below is the one we use for our recipes.  It was published some time ago and there are more recent books available, but years ago I saw the authors speak at a conference so I am partial to this one.  They've published on a really diverse range of topics and are interesting people.

Of course, I caught a cold from younger Toad and got my period too, but it was still so great to get away.  We had a gourmet meal without complaints about the food, got to carry on a conversation without interruption, and slept in.  I hope all of you reading this get a break soon too.

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